Barbara's Birthday

Barbara's birthday was yesterday and we took her out for dinner. Everyone met in the German Colony at the Faces cafe, which we first ate at the day we walked from Mercaz HaCarmel to downtown. The food was fabulous as usual. We ordered several salads and entrees to share, and wrapped everything up with this unbelievable cake. Lina brought sparkler candles and Barbara made her wish and blew out her candles.

29 candles go out.

The dinner was a lot of fun, and a little outrageous as well. Nate, Lina and I serenaded Barbara for her birthday. It drew some funny looks, both from other people at our table and people at other tables. There is a reason I've been told I have chutzpa. No one here had more than a glass of wine, so this was just us!



After dinner, we came back and continued the celebration at the dorms. We threw a dance party at Nate's flat and got everyone in the right frame of mind with the powerful mix of nargilah, Turkish coffee and wine. I went to bed at 3 A.M. Barbara is going home in a week so it was a nice chance to throw one final party with her. Changes are coming to the international school once again. Shabbat shalom.

(Left to right) Sebastian, Barbara, Shoaq, Nate, Lina, and lil' old me.

The Mossad "Allegedly" Gets Their Man

Imad Mughniyeh, arch terrorist and a zealot who helped to found Hizballah in the early 80's was blown straight to hell Monday night in a car bombing in Damascus. My condolences to his loved ones. Predictably enough, the Mossad has refused to accept credit for the assassination, but they are still high fiving each other up front and behind the back. Knesset member and former head of Mossad Danny Yatom had this to say about the assassination: ""Mughniyah was one of the most dangerous and cruel terrorists of all time. There are numerous intelligence agencies and countries that have been pursuing him, and the one that was successful in reaching him [has proven itself] - to have a high intelligence and operational capability." I can almost picture him snickering as he said this, patting himself and his coworkers on the back for a job well done.

In a response just as predictable as Israel's, Hezballah, Hamas, Syria and Iran have pointed the finger squarely at Israel and issued their tired, stereotyped responses to the "Zionist crimes" and swore bloody revenge. Maintaining their strict policy of tight lipped plausible deniability, the office of the Prime Minister released this statement: “Israel rejects the attempt by terrorist elements to ascribe to it any involvement whatsoever in this incident.” I'm not entirely certain, but I believe that this statement, when translated into Farsi reads "fuck ya'll!!!!!!"

Pitchers And Catchers Report

Every religion has their festivals, many of which are long and unnecesarily drawn out. Jews have 8 long days of cholesterol and matza induced constipation. Christians get 6 weeks of bad music and bogus "War on Christmas" stories on Fox News. Muslims have the pleasure of skipping lunch for an entire month. For Cubs fans, the protracted holiday season begins today: pitchers and catchers have reported to Mesa! Glory, glory hallelujah!

Of course today is ultimately little more than an embellished landmark on the road from the darkness of the offseason to the sublimity of baseball's rebirth. If opening day is Christmas, than today is a mere Black Friday. "But Eddie", you'll protest, "this is a broken analogy! Baseball isn't a religious experience!" Tell that to these whackos: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ib8s3Ozgccc

So today, on this the holiest day of the month of February, we pray that the baseball gods will deliver us swiftly to the regular season, devoid of any hot tub or fungo bat related injuries, and perhaps they will see fit to nominate a sucker to take Jason Marquis off our hands. Amen.

(I get the distinct impression I'll be atoning for this post on Yom Kippur.)

Haifus - Interruptus

Last night was supposed to be the long awaited rematch between Maccabi Haifa and Beitar Jerusalem, following this 0-0 debacle at Kiryat Eliezer stadium in early November. Omri and I joined a score of Israelis in the dorm moadon to watch the game. Everything started off the way I figured it would - fans cheering and taunting each other, players going for each others throats etc... Then without warning, the power at Tedy stadium in Jerusalem failed. The field and stands went dark and thousands of cell phones were immediately lit. At first the fans took this as a sign to up their baiting to deafening levels, but after it became apparent that the game wasn't going to start up again any time soon, everyone quieted down and just stood waiting. The power company tried to kick start the generator, but when black smoke started billowing out onto the field, they gave up. The game was canceled and will need to be rescheduled. In the meantime, this just reinforces in my mind that everything in Jerusalem is shitty and falling apart. אם אשכחך ירושלים תשכח ימיני... Riiiigggghhhhtttt.

Viva El Sábado

One of the things that often gets lost in the frenzy of living in the Jewish state is actual religious practice. For better or for worse, Judaism is primarily an ethnic identity for most Israelis as opposed to their religion. I like to contrast this with American Judaism, where Americans who identify with Judaism tend to find the religious aspects to be much more central to their self identification. One of the symptoms of this dichotomy for me is that I have become increasingly "חילוני" since I arrived in Israel, a term that describes the Israelis who live a secular lifestyle while still maintaining ties to Judaism through the lens of living and working in a Jewish society. Occasionally, it is nice to get back to my roots and participate in some good old fashioned prayer. Friday night, Ayelet, Nimrod and I made kiddush at her apartment. It was refreshing. Every now and then it is good for the soul. It was brief of course, and we left for "Shabbat" dinner at our friend Eli's apartment immediately after.

Eli (on the right) and Nimrod.

Eli's family made aliyah from Mexico City a number of years ago. Why is this relevant? We had a real Mexican meal on Friday night, the first Mexican food, real or imagined that I have tasted since coming to Israel 4 months ago! It was good too. He knows what he is doing in the kitchen. We had beef and chicken with real tortillas, along with salad, guacamole and salsa. There was also plenty of pork available as well as shredded cheese, but I let the other people at dinner dig in to the obviously not kosher options.

A frank discussion of napkins.

Dinner was a sordid affair. There was lots of heavy food, lots of red wine, and plenty of risque conversation. I got into a conversation with one guy over American foreign policy and our the hegemonic nature of our culture. We each put away about a bottle of wine, so the argument was fueled by Cabernet. Eventually we settled into a game of "never have I ever." There were plenty of embarrassing revelations, and dares that ranged from hilarious to vile and disgusting. Eli's roommate Itamar attempted to drink a raw egg on a dare. It ended up in the sink.

Things got a little nutty as the night progressed.

We had initially planned to head to a club from dinner, but after 4 hours at home, everyone was thinking pub instead. We headed to a pub I've never before been to that is at the base of the Carmel, near the German Colony. The name escapes me. The pub had an art theme so we spent a good deal of the rest of the night talking about art. It's not my strength, but it was cool to do nonetheless. We got back to campus around 3 A.M., and after another 45 minutes of guitar and singing, I finally admitted I couldn't keep my eyes open anymore and headed to bed. I woke up at 1:30 the following afternoon. Good deal!

Wrapping up the evening.